The ropes twisted around me are getting stronger, I long for a way to get it out. To end the pain and misery, yet. In the back of my mind, seeps a curious little heart that seems to enjoy this pain.
I am wracked for hours, agonizing over all that I felt. Strangely pure death, but a bit of me enjoys it. I flash memories of used-to-be's and the rope got tighter. I do not know when it ends, but pain endures for a long time
I get tired easily today. Field demo is picking up the pace. Alpha and Omega is giving me the creeps. And my card scared the wits outta me.
I do not know how to handle more of the pressure but I have to. I am slowly torn inside. Not just a bit, but slowly and painfully, like torture. Every element in my life coming down to crash. It is like the sharp ropes I have described earlier.
I am Numb
Sick By Definition but not in reality.
I wish for a little comfort and light. And the 9TH 24 hour of this month is not gonna get me easy.
I want it all to stop, for me to breathe and keep up with the pace again.
:'/
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